In today's wellbeing piece, I focus on raising self-awareness about inner self-talk and how we can learn to tame the inner bully.
There are some great talks and podcast links from Kristen Neff, Sharon Salzberg and Tara Brach on the link. Read more about self-compassion below.
Self-acceptance and self-compassion
In this podcast, positive psychology and creativity expert Scott Barry Kaufman explores his recent book, “Transcend”. They explore his ideas about re-working Maslow’s hierarchy of needs to develop a new understanding between meeting unmet primal needs, connection, warmth and shelter, and meaning finding and purpose.
This talk gets to the heart of understanding that mindfulness means raising our self-awareness about our triggers, weaknesses and deficits and leaning into these things with acceptance and self-compassion.
Developing greater self-compassion
In this podcast, Sharon Salzberg talks to Kristen Neff. Along with Paul Gilbert, Neff is one of the leading researchers in the field of self-compassion.
They discuss some of the reasons why a harsh self-critical response can engage our fight/flight response and undermine our wellbeing as well as our ability to respond to challenges and collaborate effectively.
Self-compassion research is a large and emerging field in psychology. Both Gilbert, Neff and other researchers have developed highly effective programs to help people develop greater self-compassion. Self-compassion is intertwined with compassion for others and connection with others.
Mindfulness and leaning into self-awareness
In this talk from 1988 mindfulness expert and psychotherapist explores the link between mindfulness, counselling, therapy, and coaching.
He provides fascinating insights into some of the limits of mindfulness in a Western setting. Mindfulness has become core in education and workplace training but many of the training programs cherry pick bits of eastern contemplative practises. There are great benefits in teaching people how to be more focussed and regulate their emotions through self-soothing.
Getting the balance right between remaining calm but not aloof
I like this talk by Jack Kornfield. It’s from about eight years ago and goes to the heart of mindfulness psychology. How on the one hand can we have equanimity – easy come/easy go/not holding on to stuff whilst being compassionate and caring.
Jack Kornfield podcasts often have the feel of a bedtime story. But he skilfully weaves together his knowledge of contemplative eastern traditions and psychotherapy.