What is emotional intelligence or EQ?
The godfathers of emotional intelligence, Mayer, Salovey and Caruso were the first major researchers in this area and they defined EQ as:
"the ability to perceive emotions, to access and generate emotions so as to assist thought, to understand emotions and emotional knowledge, and to reflectively regulate emotions so as to promote emotional and intellectual growth."
Emotions arise for many reasons. It may be that someone triggers us (because they remind us of the past) or their values do not align with our own or they are impeding us attaining our goals. When this happens we may lash out in an unhelpful way or we can learn techniques to help us pause and observe the emotions as they arise. This self-reflection makes us stronger and gives us choices.
Developing EQ helps us learn about our triggers and helps us grow from them.
In the self-reflection space we may be able to see the bigger picture and appreciate that the person in front of us is not the cause of our problems but part of the solution.
We may also realise that whilst we still feel aggrieved by the person’s actions, in that brief pause we are able to regulate our emotions and explain clearly and calmly why we feel upset.
Developing the self-reflection space enables us to better choose the moment of action. For example the person in front of you may be in a place where there is no meeting of hearts and minds and you are better off delaying the conversation to a later date in a different environment.
The self-reflection space may also enable us to be less reactive and access the wisdom from past training, our personal experiences, our procedural experiences, our personality and our intuition.
Why develop it?
People with a heightened level of EQ tend to be more resilient, handle stress better, communicate effectively and make progress in their chosen careers .
People with good EQ abilities are able to learn from their own emotions and other people’s and then choose either to act or not act. Emotions convey information. They do not necessarily mean that we have to act. People with good EQ tend to be able to harness information from emotions and synthesise it with their work knowledge, procedural knowledge, social intelligence and personality to help them make great decisions.
Can it be developed?
EQ is an ability, which can be developed through evidenced based neuroscience coaching.
The Mayer, Salovey, Caruso test (MSCEIT) measures EQ and gives a tailored report on a persons ability in each of these four areas:
- Recognising Emotions - ability to recognise emotions in ourselves and others as well from the environment
- Facilitating Thought - The ability to generate, use, and feel emotion as necessary to communicate feelings or employ them in your thinking style
- Understanding Emotions - ability to understand emotional information, understand how emotions combine and progress through relationship transitions, and to appreciate such emotional meanings
- Managing Emotions - ability to be open to feelings, and to modulate them in oneself and others so as to promote personal understanding and growth
What is you next step to developing EQ?
To do the test contact Andy Roberts at Breathe London and we will send you test details and login details for the test.
The online test takes about 45 . Once you have done the test we will receive your unique scoring profile from our colleagues in the US. You get eight sub scores measuring your ability to recognise, use , understand and manage emotions. We then create a personal feedback report for you and deliver the report during our a 90-minute coaching session. In the session we talk about your results, give coaching suggestions and explore how you can embed the learning at work or home.
After 4 weeks we do a follow up 30 minute coaching session to further embed the learning.
Our approach is to use the latest evidenced based neuro leadership development techniques to improve your EQ abilities.